Cats are Better Than People
99% of the time
Disclaimer: This is an article for those who love cats, or at least tolerate cats. If you (wrongly) think that cats are evil, or you’re an avid dog person, you may want to go read something else.
“A happy arrangement: many people prefer cats to other people, and many cats prefer people to other cats.” — Mason Cooley
Cats are great! I mean, REALLY great. And people love cats; images and videos of cats are some of the most viewed content on the internet. You can’t swing a dead cat on the internet without hitting a cute cat video.
I have two cats myself, River the tuxie and Pumpkin a ginger and I love them more than I’ve ever loved any man.
There are many reasons why cats are better than people, and here are a few of them…
Cats will never lie
When River has had enough cuddles, she will let me know. She doesn’t let me continue then talk with Pumpkin behind my back about how clingy I am.
The only time she will bend the truth is when she tries to convince me that she hasn’t had treats when someone gave her some five minutes ago.
Cats will never judge you
Do you want to eat pizza for every meal? That’s fine with kitties, as long as you remember to fill up their bowl too. You can eat a whole tub of ice cream in one sitting and a cat will still snuggle up beside you and love you just the same.
Cats have simple wants & needs
River and Pumpkin really only care about a handful of things: naps, food, treats, toys, head scritches, and boxes. Most of what they do during the day is related to one of those. I never worry about the emotional labour, because there is none.
Cats will ask for what they want
When River wants a treat or a cuddle, she will ask me. I don’t have to use tarot cards to try and figure out what she wants; she certainly doesn’t get mad and make passive-aggressive comments if I don’t just KNOW what she wants.
Cats are nap experts
I swear River is such a pretty kitty because she gets so much beauty rest. She is definitely one of those cats that sleep for 16 hours a day. As a nap enthusiast, I wish to know her secrets on how to sleep so successfully.
Cats are very smart
A cat’s brain is a mysterious place full of tuna and greenies and mice toys. While their brains might be small, their cerebral cortexes are more complex than a dog’s. It has 300 million neurons, almost twice as many as a dog’s.
They also manipulate their human companions by mimicking sounds human babies make. River knows how to make the most pathetic sounding meow, especially when met with a closed door. What a smart kitty.
Cats are basically magic
Want a dose of happiness? Hug a cat. A cat’s purr has healing powers! There’s nothing more relaxing than watching a sleeping cat. Ever touch a cat’s belly hair? It’s as soft as angel feathers.
