If women acted the way some men do in a relationship we’d be called “lazy,” “unattractive,” or told we’re “letting ourselves go.” We carry most of the emotional labour in the relationship to and are expected to care and nurture our partners without expecting much in return. We give and give and are told that our needs only matter second to a man’s. That’s the default.
But god forbid someone mentions a man making an effort for his woman.
It goes both ways. If you make an effort to be the best version of yourself, then I’ll make an effort to be mine. Then we lift each other up and have a great relationship.
But probably not with you if that’s your attitude.